“Having overheard romantically inclined thoughts from people in the First Order,” Ben half-sighed, half-chuckled, “I believe you’re right. It is unplanned and chaotic and I was far too smug about not being a part of it. This feels almost like payback for all my internal mockery of the people around me.”
He wasn’t sure how to respond to his mother’s immediate desire to go punch Snoke. On the one hand, it was deeply touching. On the other, he’d fallen to the Dark Side and there were consequences to that. Everyone had told him about the evils and cruelty that awaited, he just hadn’t listened, so really, in a way, it was his fault. But that discussion was for another time. He didn’t come here to get his past sorted out, but his future, so bright and sweet and full of love and promise if only he could manage to get it right.
“I don’t – I don’t know, how to rely on someone. I haven’t done it in a long time.” Just admitting it was hard, pushing words past barriers of pride that still rose up in his mind sometimes to try to silence him. “Perhaps, if I could have more time with them, it would come naturally. I don’t know. I wasn’t around to see how you and Father interacted or supported each other, so I don’t know what’s normal. But if you can do anything to give Poe, Rey and I even a little bit more time together, that would help a lot. I think. I hope.”
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branchandroot
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Date: 2017-05-13 07:40 pm (UTC)He wasn’t sure how to respond to his mother’s immediate desire to go punch Snoke. On the one hand, it was deeply touching. On the other, he’d fallen to the Dark Side and there were consequences to that. Everyone had told him about the evils and cruelty that awaited, he just hadn’t listened, so really, in a way, it was his fault. But that discussion was for another time. He didn’t come here to get his past sorted out, but his future, so bright and sweet and full of love and promise if only he could manage to get it right.
“I don’t – I don’t know, how to rely on someone. I haven’t done it in a long time.” Just admitting it was hard, pushing words past barriers of pride that still rose up in his mind sometimes to try to silence him. “Perhaps, if I could have more time with them, it would come naturally. I don’t know. I wasn’t around to see how you and Father interacted or supported each other, so I don’t know what’s normal. But if you can do anything to give Poe, Rey and I even a little bit more time together, that would help a lot. I think. I hope.”