"I don't want this to strain things between Luke and Rey. She admires him immensely. Their friendship is honestly good for both of them, and if I had known I was going to fall for her I would have avoided her for his sake, but I didn't plan this. We simply happened. Which I know does not sound romantic in the least."
His first thought at her next words was a spike of dread. He didn't want to lose them to their lack of attraction to each other - he'd dreaded it the moment they became aware they were both interested in him. Ben's life had been spent being left behind by people or leaving. He didn't have a lot of hope that such a pattern could change, not for him. As much as he wanted to believe that they could make it work, he knew from the outset they were fighting long odds.
Then he turned red and buried his face in his free hand. "Mother," he proclaimed, mortified, "I cannot believe you just asked that. I - a minute, I need a minute." He focused on his breathing, trying to get over how much he suddenly really didn't want to have this conversation. "Well, we've kissed. Rey's a much more forceful kisser than Poe, but they both seem to enjoy messing up my hair. I like sleeping next to Poe and holding onto him. Rey and I, we... things got heated, once, but somehow her grabbing my hips reminded me of when Snoke broke my ribs to give me incentive to learn Force Healing. That killed the mood." He deflated, feeling ashamed of himself. Rey's confusion, fear and then anger at Snoke could have been avoided, she could have been happy, if he had just pushed past it. It was only a memory, after all. "Poe and I might've had something similar occur had BB-8 not rolled in and shrieked at us just as we had our shirts off." And then the droid had shrieked at Ben because apparently, it was under the impression Ben's visible bones meant he was dying. Again: mood killer.
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branchandroot
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Date: 2017-04-17 05:45 am (UTC)His first thought at her next words was a spike of dread. He didn't want to lose them to their lack of attraction to each other - he'd dreaded it the moment they became aware they were both interested in him. Ben's life had been spent being left behind by people or leaving. He didn't have a lot of hope that such a pattern could change, not for him. As much as he wanted to believe that they could make it work, he knew from the outset they were fighting long odds.
Then he turned red and buried his face in his free hand. "Mother," he proclaimed, mortified, "I cannot believe you just asked that. I - a minute, I need a minute." He focused on his breathing, trying to get over how much he suddenly really didn't want to have this conversation. "Well, we've kissed. Rey's a much more forceful kisser than Poe, but they both seem to enjoy messing up my hair. I like sleeping next to Poe and holding onto him. Rey and I, we... things got heated, once, but somehow her grabbing my hips reminded me of when Snoke broke my ribs to give me incentive to learn Force Healing. That killed the mood." He deflated, feeling ashamed of himself. Rey's confusion, fear and then anger at Snoke could have been avoided, she could have been happy, if he had just pushed past it. It was only a memory, after all. "Poe and I might've had something similar occur had BB-8 not rolled in and shrieked at us just as we had our shirts off." And then the droid had shrieked at Ben because apparently, it was under the impression Ben's visible bones meant he was dying. Again: mood killer.